…joy comes in the morning

March 23, 2010 parkis2

Well, the long dreaded day has passed. It is now over a year ago that Rodney died. I am amazed at the faithfulness of the Lord! I shouldn’t be…He said He would never leave us nor forsake us. Indeed, He did not!

The year, in spite of the pain, passed quickly. Yes, there were long, lonely days and nights, and in some ways it seems like he’s been gone a very long time. But overall, the year went by quickly. Saying that almost makes me feel guilty, but I know that guilt does not come from He Who Saves our Souls.

After Rod died, I felt there would never be a normal life again. I simply wanted my old normal back…period. I didn’t want to face the changes ahead and I was not looking forward to walking through those dark days. I DID however, feel the Presence of Christ on a daily basis. I knew (and still do), that His Word is true. He said that “Joy comes in the morning.” I walked and walked through sad days, hurting nights, many misgivings, and often felt that I was bleeding pain. But through it all, KNEW WITHOUT A DOUBT that the joy He promised would come.

I miss my beloved, but I am adjusting to my new normal. Last week I woke up chipper and feeling alive for the first time in a good while. The two cats (Kit and Kaboodle) that I adopted to add some life to the quietness of the house, were purring comfortably next to me. My insides were happy.

I will always miss my husband, ALWAYS. I will cry periodically (like now), but I waited and His Word is true!! Joy has come in the morning.

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One Comment Add your own

1. Roselyn Prow | March 24, 2010 at 4:28 am

Paula, You did a great job of giving your thoughts and feelings. I know from talking with you that you are mending, but will always have a patch. From all the letters that you have written me over the last 20 years,you have followed the Holy Spirit and His prompting. Both of you always did that together and now you are still doing it. Love, Auntie

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